Random events, random thoughts, and random questions?
I have been neglecting my writing for a while, I do that occasionally, and it never works well for me. I need to write, I have to practice doing it or what is that saying, “use it or loose it” yet, I don’t follow easy instructions (sometimes). Even as I sit here, tapping on the keys of my laptop, I am also trying to get my old pc back online. Ugh! I just cannot leave it alone, I am not concentrating on one thing, I am too fragmented to do anything well, just a mixed bag of randomness lately. I know that, I feel the consequence of that, and yet, I don’t seem to move away from the usual (and nonproductive) pattern which I have fallen into. I remember when my nephew Hays told me he was leaving myspace and going to find a new home in the comforts of the virtual community of facebook. I did not want him to do that, I recall writing him a stern warning (one that I had read) that facebook was not a good place to be, it was almost impossible to remove your identity from it, not just a simple matter of deleting your id, one guy said it took him about 8 hours of deleting all the stuff that he had “joined” to actually leave the facebook community, seems as long as you have one of application still open, facebook holds on to all of your data. Just found a guy who has figured out how to “work around” the facebook prison, and it seems if one is in need of permanently leaving facebook, he gives precise instructions. His name is Jonathan click here to see his info (YES!) way to go Jonathan, thanks! (just got a nice comment back from Jonathan and apparently the fix is no longer working. You can read his comment to me below) darn! Maybe fb has us for life after all? shez?
However, at the time that I was counseling Hays, (unsolicited, I might add) I was concerned that he would end up looking for a job and his employer notice something that might reflect badly upon him and he might not get hired or something crazy like that. (I read that too). But as usual Hays did not see merit in my warnings, and moved forward with his plans to join facebook, which by the way, I had been signed up to for almost a year by that time, but never could figure out how to use the darn thing, so even though I had an active account, I did not use it at all, thus it wasn’t a big deal or any type of *time* drain. Eventually, I did not heed my good Samaritan warning to Hays, and did a swan dive right into the big middle of facebook. If you are a member of facebook, you probably know what I mean, and if you are not a member of facebook, I won’t bore you with the grimy details, but just suffice to say, it is a *time drain*. Just as bad as tv, or sitting in a prison cell, or anything that can consume large portions of your life and basically get you NO WHERE fast. Now I forgot where I was going with this? See, that is facebook’s fault too! 😉 NOT! ha!!
Random thoughts! oh right.
Here are a few things that I have been doing lately
Worried about Peaches – she is almost 12 years old and lately she won’t eat.
Wasting time of Farm Town – a VERY ADDICTIVE virtual farm that has recently added lots of new and innovative little improvements,which have completely grabbed my attention.
Bought a new DSLR Camera – which is a very positive move and one that I am very excited about.
Well folks, that is about it. Sad huh? Not very productive see? Of course there are many things that I do each day, I am not saying that I don’t do anything else, but that is the top of the list. I am very embarrassed to confess this. I mean I do watch movies, I have learned how to use new software on my pc, I have a job that doesn’t require me to interact every day, so I get my work done and back off. (sometimes that is the hardest part) I am not complaining, (whining, yes) but I have to get more out of living that this. Something that I like to think about during times like this is Annie Dillard’s line “how you spend your days, is how you spend your life” . ouch! In my own defense, I use the rebuttal, “this too shall pass”.
There is a eastern practice that is used to teach the concept of impermanence, where the monks are asked to build large structures on a flat piece of glass made of sand. After they perfect their creation the teacher comes and picks up the work and dumps the sand artwork on the ground. Nothing is going to last, so we have to learn to let go of our attachment to that thing, person, or event. All I can say about the farm town thing, is soon I will use that lesson of impermanence and delete my work, then I will be learning how to reach a higher plateau in my endeavor toward “enlightenment” . laughing! omg! what a crock of rationalization that is. laughing. <sigh>
Chicken Livers? (my title today)
Yesterday Peaches would not eat at all. I have pulled out all the bells and whistles. I have cooked chicken (organic) rice (no gmo for her, only gourmet rice) chicken broth (the sally fallon way). I buy organic baby food and organic yogurt, even the dog food (kibble) is from a specialty store. None of this is getting her attention. She takes a sniff or two and walks away. Right now the vet says they don’t find anything wrong with her, she is on a few medications for a kidney aliment, and chinese herbs which are supposed to help her appetite. What am I to do??? Last night I went to a Shar Pei forum and looked to see if Icould find any solutions there, I did not find exactly what I needed (a way to get her to eat) but I found some who had older “geriatric” dogs who have lost there zest for eating. I did find a guy on another blog who wrote about his dog not eating and how he was able to extend the life of his dogs by feeding them baby food or grinding up food and mixing it together so the older sr dogs could eat it easier. So after reading that, I thought, well ok, I give in, I will buy more of the chicken legs and add more to her rice, (she will pick the meat out of her food and eat that) . Now here is the HP part. This morning I asked God for help (finally did that) I asked God to help me in my attempt to feed Peaches, I prayed for her well being, and if it was the time for her to go, that it be gentle. But, the biggest part of the deal is that I ASKED!
Back in AA years ago, my sponsor (who had about 22 years in AA) told me one time that she forgets that when she asked God for help, he doesn’t actually “fix” things, he gives us the power to figure out how to ourselves. I have learned that over and over in my life. If I ask for help, the powerful guidance will come. This morning, I moved out my box, I drove from the early downtown walk with Peaches to Wholefoods and while walking along the poultry isle, I spotted something I never noticed (or gave much thought to) CHICKEN LIVERS. I picked them up and they are good quality, from good quality chickens, price was very reasonable, and I thought, gosh, I bet she won’t be able to refuse this. I came home, cooked up about 4 or 5 of those babies, and man did she eat. I was so happy. GOD (good orderly direction) What a blessing!
Peaches two days ago in the Robert E Lee park standing under the Weeping Willow Cherry Blossom Tree.
Oh, oh, oh….and the Five Tibetan Rites, I am doing those, how could I forget. (five months now)