This blog today is about looking back and rewriting the same things that I wrote one year ago.
I stumbled across an old email to a pal that was having some issues and when I read through my email I found my words very poignant, not only to his situation? maybe they helped him, but they were good words/thoughts, for I am not always in that good a spot myself, reading my “wisdom” God’s inspiration is what is was….was in a way sad to me, for I don’t know if I have continued to grow in the direction that I wrote in that email. so here goes, this is from 2007.
Bird outside my window was eating a plum.
If you judge people, you have no time to love them. – Mother Teresa
That compassion makes us protective rather than controlling. The difference is crucial in creating long-term, life-enhancing results.
You cannot launch a negative attitude or a judgment at someone(especially yourself! ) and still feel peaceful and good about yourself. In those moments, it’s impossible to feel lovable or safe.
got the above from another newsletter I get, came today…Mary Robinson? I think?
and your also added lots of if’s….
My friend, I hear you, when this world gets squirrely, things continue like a spiral, to spin faster and faster.
I guess it would be like an old fashion top, when you pick it back up again wrap that string around it again and spin it, it goes some more. That is what we do when we play those head games in our head…..we spin the top, over and over. What does it get?
I was wondering what I was going to say to you about that[part of] last line of your email to me, for to me, that was the most poignant. The rest, yeah, it happened, life does….we make the best decisions based upon the information available to us at the time.
Sure we make mistakes, and some of em, are deadly mistakes, we are not perfect, no one gets that award here on planet earth. Matter of fact, lots of gifted and famous historical figures have proven that time and time again. Let me ask you, do you think you are unique? You may have regrets, we all have em, and man would I loved to have a second chance. What about Bill Clinton and his BJ? Bet he would like to take that one back? He cannot….stuck on him like that stain her dress…grinning! 😉
This is from c.s. lewis The Problem of Pain..
“in a game of chess you can make certain arbitrary concessions to your opponent, which stand to the ordinary rules of the game as miracles stand to the laws of nature. You can deprive yourself of a castle, or allow the other man sometimes to take back a move made inadvertently. But if you conceded everything that at any moment to suit him – if all his moves were revocable and if all your pieces disappeared whenever there position on the board was not to his liking – then you could not have a game at all. So it is with the life of souls in a world: fixed laws, consequences, unfolding by casual necessity, the whole natural order, are at once the limits within which their common life is confined and also the sole condition under which any such life is possible. Try to exclude the possibility of suffering which the order of nature and the existence of free wills involve, and you find that you have excluded life itself.
That is this life, and thus we get to have this free will and with that comes the choices, and the choices are not always our own, we find ourselves trapped in the web of circumstances and thus we grab at the best available decision….
And I ask you again…”how big is the cross?” you can put it down, you don’t have to carry it, someone did it for you already. For You, for me….for us ALL….
If anything; that free will gets us…..(and it is called free?) that we pay or chose to pay for our judgment of ourselves all through life, or when we get to AA and someone makes us do that dreaded 4 and 5. That helps, but still we can take back those old regrets, we can wallow in our pain.
That is why we move on to step 6… Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
with that step we can look for hope….a new me/you!
One thing that I love about AA, is this…it gives us solutions and it gives us promises….lots more that just the promises listed after step 9, someone said over a 100 listed in the Big Book.
We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.
So Friend, as you know better than me, your life has been a jumble of different experiences, and all the if’s in the world won’t take back, but through the program of AA, and the Mercy and Grace of God, we get to live with a serenity and peace that we never dreamed would be ours.
Sure I realize that folks out there are suffering, there are lots of those who has his hands full of a mess, but miracles from God do happen, we know that. God’s grace, and mercy is given to many, many people unmerited. We can pray, we can remain humble in not knowing what the outcome should be. His will is[for us to live] a humble life, living our own free will and disregarding God, is what we used to be like, and today we choose a different way.
Is that one easy, nope///but you know what? It IS what it IS…final answer.
I copied this not sure if Twain said it, but still good!
Mark Twain, ( at least I believe so) made the following quote; ” If a man/woman approaches you with a huge smile, and their arm stretched out, and saying loudly, ‘ I know the truth!’ then there is only one thing to do. Turn around and run like hell.”
So I don’t know the truth!...no way, and if I thought I did….well I feel sorry for me? grinning!
humbly I say to you, you are loved and you are perfect in God’s eyes. He loves us ALL. I am convinced of that, and rely upon it> I believe that you do as well.
sometimes life is not smooth, but the life we get is sometimes based upon the complex nature of our mind. some of the more simpleton guys/gals in AA say the darnedest things? I think, how can it be that simple? I can carve up a thought into a million pieces…grinning.
you hang in there, and don’t forget….that next miracle may be YOURS, we just don’t know, do we! love anam cara, jimmiebobs/peaches
So that was it, the letter I wrote ove
r a year ago. I wonder if I could write it that way today? I might be able to draw from the well, but the well water has become pretty low. The rope and bucket need to be pretty long to reach down that far.
Today? I AM ….
Grateful for my health, my home, my family, my Peaches, my job, my friends, my life, my moments of calm reflection.
Today? I AM living more simply, I learn more and feel less.