Maybe? Maybe Not?

You can never have a happy ending at the end of an unhappy journey; it just doesn’t work out that way. The way you’re feeling, along the way, is the way you’re continuing to pre-pave your journey, and it’s the way it’s going to continue to turn out until you do something about the way you are feeling.

Excerpted from a workshop in West Los Angeles, CA on Saturday, August 6th, 2005

All Is Well

My morning reading from Abraham/Hicks hit right on spot this morning. I was just finished having a conversation with my mother about enabling. She wasn’t interested in my viewpoint. She all but ignored my protest regarding her sister and the ever growing memory issues that plague my aunt. Details not worth writing here, but  most important is the outcome. My outcome, that is.  For in the end, this is just my journey, and not matter how others choose to live out their life, I have absolutely no input into their choices.

So for me, my journey, (it is the only journey). I make choices based upon my own perception of events, sometimes I make choices based upon others needs, but all in all, my choices make my life. I am responsible to myself; not to fix others. 

In the reading it says that happiness is about the journey, I get that part. But, it says an unhappy journey will not end happily. hmmm? maybe? maybe not? I get that in a way, but still I must question this. Because, when we are unhappy, sometimes that becomes the impetus for change. How to change the unhappy outcomes becomes the reason to move at times in our life. No matter if the journey has been happy or unhappy, I believe we can stop, become aware of the situation, and make better choices that will result in different outcomes.

Maybe? in a more esoterica way I can see what the writer is referring to in regard to unhappy journey.  Maybe? in a larger broader sense this is the vibrational path to living the “happy” life?  But, in the more day to day movement we humans encounter as life, we don’t have the luxury of skipping along a path free of negative, unhealthy, greedy, and unawakened people. The world is full of all different humans who have evolved to where they are and nothing that I can conjure up in my own little (((vibrational))) world will change them.  Nor will my ability to disregard their reality. What happens is this: if I am able to disconnect from their misery, disconnect in an emotional response sort of way, then I can see the bigger picture and offer what assistance is best for both parties. Otherwise, I become the doormat, and misery will be the dirt that those who walk over me leave as a calling card. 

Henry Hays, (1804-1884)

This is a photo of my gr gr gr grandfather. You will not know him, you may have heard of him if you are related to me, but you still don’t know him. I chose this photo, of this man, because his expression seems to be pretty unhappy.  He has a less than stellar history as well. One I chose not to advertise. Let me just say he is a “skeleton in my closet” (old saying for not so great ancestor). 

His choices are dead with him, his life has no bearing on mine today. Yet here is his photo, to remind me of those who came before me, and the life that they lived. He might have made better choices, he might have looked different as a result of those choices. I don’t have answers to that, but I can see his expression is pretty glum.

His genes are my genes?

Annie Dillard ask this question in her book Pilgrim At Tinker Creek:

“It does not matter a hoot what the Mockingbird on the chimney is singing.

If the mockingbird were chirping to give us the long sought formula for a unified field theory, the point would be only slightly less relevant. The real and proper question is: Why is it beautiful? “

and she goes on to remind us that beauty is objective.

But her question is valid, to all of life. What is beautiful?

So today, as I sit here trying to sort out confused family features; a family with long genetic ties to unhealthy choices.  I may not have answers to most of the questions, but certainly, that one Annie is asking has merit. What is beautiful? (and try to be objective).

Gratitude is  beautiful.

I can always find grace in this life that I have been given. I can go outside right now and stand looking up and see a beautiful blue sky, it is a constant, and even when the clouds of storms begin to gather, (I have been able to shoot some magnificent photos of storm clouds) life can be viewed through a lens which will be enough……

 Enough is with me, enough to keep me going through one more day, and in the moment, until this feeling passes, and I can see what is beautiful again.

Maybe? Maybe Not?   šŸ˜‰

Sophia Hays (1868-1950)

My great aunt, I never met her, but…

 She is beautiful, to me.

have fun~


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